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Unnoticed Emotions: Understanding and Overcoming Emotional Invalidation
“I feel really sad today.”
“You have no reason to be sad. Others have bigger problems than you.”
The message here is that the person’s feelings of sadness aren’t justified and don’t matter. Sounds familiar, right?
This is one form of invalidating feelings. We both give and receive such invalidations, often with the best intentions. Sometimes, we even invalidate ourselves.
Invalidating feelings is a common experience and it feels uncomfortable. We’ve all been through it!
Invalidating feelings means someone’s emotions are ignored or minimized, making them feel wrong or insignificant.
You might feel more stressed today than a few days ago. You brush it off as insignificant. This is a form of emotional minimization.
The first step is to realize what we’re doing. To become aware of it.
Knowing when we invalidate our feelings is an important first step.
